Essay Writing (Education)

IELTS-Writing1

Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in a separate school. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answers

 

Having co-educational system has always been a controversial issue. Some people argue single-sex schools are better while others believe mixed-sex schools are more beneficial. Both groups are looking for better performance an environment. I think co-educational system in all levels is far more advantageous.

The opponents of co-educational system presents their idea based on two main reasons, first one is performance issue and another one is their religious beliefs. First and foremost, they claim that when boys and girls study in same class, they would lose their concentration and it is because of their age. In fact, they would be preoccupied by attracting opposite sex rather than studying. Second, there is a portion of parents who have some specific religious beliefs and think that nurturing boys and girls in same class, specifically in teen ages , would have led them to sin, to have sex relationship out of marriage , which is not appropriate based on their religion.
However, the proponents of mixed-sex schools have some strong reasons. They claim when boys and girls study in same school they will have more incentives to achieve better marks to attract each other . According to recent survey conducted in Melbourne, students in mixed-sex schools gain 30 percent better results in university entrance exams. Moreover, educational systems are designed to nurture students to gain vital soft skills rather than some topics like maths and physics. Hence, in co-educational system, students will get ready for living in a real environment which is more similar to the society. Indeed, they will learn how to deal with opposite sex.
In conclusion, as far as I am concerned, studying in same class for boys and girls is more advantageous as the soft skills they acquire in teen ages in school are not achievable in any other ages or ways .

 

Estimated band: 6.0 or 6.5

Word Count: 300

Examiner Comment: 

  1. An attempt to accomplish the task response is visible.
  2. The task response contains some inaccuracies pertaining to grammar and word choice.
  3. There are instances where sentences could have been written in a better way.
  4. The essay needs to be improved further.